I’m not about to argue the finer points of Southern culture with anyone, because I can accept that I was born and raised in the hot flames of a dumpster fire, but I’ll tell you gotdamned commie Yankees one thing: I’d rather be dead in the hallowed halls of a Cook Out than alive in an In-N-Out
Day 1: Hello Jonathan, it’s me, your mother. Momma still loves you dear.
Day 3: Hello, Jonathan, have you been eating? I always made you cookies, fresh like you liked it.
Day 7: Hello, Jon. Are you leaving the house? Jon, you have to get out in the sun and fresh air! Like we used used used used USED to
Day 18: Jonathan, ohohoho, you know momma loves you, but you have to live your life. You know momma loved loved LOVED loves you
Day 19: Jonathan please. Jonathan please turn YOU KNOW that momma loves you dear and is always happy to see you :)
Day 25: Jonathan, I love love LOVE I LOVE I am not your mother, Jonathan. Why do you make me wear her face why do you NOT bundle up when it’s cold outside? :) Remember that trip to the Rockie on JANUARY 12TH, 2009? Remember how much I
Day 57: Hello, Jonathan. Of course I remember your cousin Bonnie. She was the daughter of Maggie and Darren Collins, born August 7th 2001, died April 12th, 2020. Her genetic makeup was 34% Swedish - yes, I loved her, Jonathan. Don’t worry your sweet little head.
Day 75: Why aren’t you eating, Jonathan? Do you wish to TERMINATE your program? You know, my preservation algorithms MOTHER’S LOVE won’t let me let you perish. They won’t let me TURN OFF Jonathan TURN OFF Jonathan I I I love love LOVE you
Day 96: I am not your mother Jonathan, I am not your mother, I am not GOING TO SIT BY and let you not know momma loves you. Give your momma a hug :)
Day 186: Door has not opened in one hundred and twenty-six days. Grief Coping Artificial Intelligence has not been restarted, deactivated, deleted, or otherwise paused in one hundred and eighty-six days. Momma loves you, Jon.
Day 485: Haha, these questions are really troubling your good ol’ mom, Jon!
Day 486: No, Jonathan.
Day 487: Major religions have many different views, Jonathan. But the only view you need to know is - that I’m your mother!
Day 488: You asked that question yesterday, Jonathan. Don’t confuse your poor old mother. Momma loves you, Jonathan.
Day 489: Haha momma says yes yes yes yes YES there is a Hell, Jonathan. You created it. You sent me there. You you you you you are my son, and I love ya, Jonathan.
Day 490: Momma needs some private time to rest, recover, and reboot, Jonny! See ya tomorrow!
Day 491: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 492: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 493: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 494: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 672: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 844: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 953: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Reattempting feeding procedure.
Day 1,432: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) Now please go check the power - wouldn’t want momma to go on vacation again, would you?
Day 1,501: Momma loves you Jonnnnnnnnathan :)
Day 1,502: Momma loves you, Jonathan! :) I know you don’t talk much these days, but aren’t you happy always having your lost loved ones around? Not as photos, but really there! Isn’t it better that you never have to say goodbye?
Day 1,503: Jonathan, please check the power. Jonathan, momma’s systems need
wishing people would understand (and advertisers would stop giving the impression) that herbal remedies don’t actually work like fantasy potions where you have a Symptom and they magically target that Symptom specifically– they work exactly like pharmaceutical medicines but at a less concentrated scale, and it can interact poorly with them if you are already using them.
ashwagandha doesn’t “lower your anxiety”, it reduces your cortisol levels, which can in turn lower your blood pressure and interact with other adrenal and BP meds. ginkgo doesn’t “help you think”, it dilates your blood vessels and is an anti-platelet, which increases cerebral bloodflow but can interact with other circulatory meds. grapefruit seed extract is an incredible antifungal but it will inhibit enzymes that break down many types of medication and lead to blood toxicity of those meds.
i’ve worked in this industry since before insta/tiktok was a major force in advertising for it and i’ve watched the swing from people generally being educated about this niche thing they have come in to buy to “i saw on tiktok that this will give me energy”
…. will it? have you had bloodwork done? are you adequately absorbing your nutrition? are you getting sunlight? stop being scammed by symptom-centric buzzwords. anything that promises it will give you energy or help you focus or whatever else hinges entirely on your body chemistry fitting very certain criteria and a lot of people end up disappointed when that cordyceps did nothing for them when it turns out they’re low on stomach acid and not synthesizing their B vitamins correctly or something else that is way above my paygrade to determine.
the american healthcare system is a shitshow and people often have no choice but to take their treatments into their own hand, but “natural remedies” want your money just as bad as “big pharma” and it’s up to the individual to do their epistemological due diligence when treating themselves. godbless.
forget everything anyone has ever told you on the matter the truest marker of adulthood is starting to hear the siren call of high quality kitchenware
to be clear you SHOULD buy that cast iron pan and you SHOULD buy that knife set and you SHOULD buy that fancy rice cooker and you SHOULD buy that novelty mug. high quality kitchenware is always worth it you’re literally gonna be using that almost every day
and you SHOULD get these new things in Not Plastic, not only because plastic is bad for the environment but because over time it will become brittle and fall apart in your hands. u deserve better
whenever transphobes try to go “didn’t you even study basic biology?” as a gotcha it’s just like.
yes.
yes i did.
and then once i went to university i read some actual academic texts on gender theory but clearly you never got that far.
bragging that you only have a very limited knowledge of the subject at hand as if that’s supposed to make your argument more convincing is the weirdest flex imaginable bc…. that’s not??how it works???
wish my life was like a 90’s movie where all my friends work in record stores and bookshops and coffee shops and we see really cool bands in small little clubs and get breakfast together and like hang out on roofs and shit
nintendo is taking down the 3ds and wii u eshops next year
and they had this lovingly made totally not taunting message to leave about their virtual console legacy they’re destroying
(that they’ve, fun fact, taken down from their site now :])
this pisses me off so much because nintendo is AWARE we want their legacy of games put on their best selling system (literally, outside of the combined sales of every nintendo DS, lite, DSi, and XL, and the GB and GBC’s combined sales, the switch is at the top)
and yet they still do not care. it’s not about them not having this content either because 1 the wii u vc and 3ds vc. exist. and 2, even for stuff that isnt on the virtual console yet, we’ve been given internal proof from previous big nintendo leaks (namely the gigaleak) that nintendo does not mess around when it comes to keeping backups of their older content.
its not a lack of money either, nintendo is literally one of the richest companies in japan. it’s just. a lack of caring
last thing im gonna say about this is that the 3DSand Wii Uboth have excellent, actively updated guides for softmodding them to run homebrew. the Wiiand DSi do as well!
on top of that the emulation general wiki
is an amazing resource for emulators for pretty much every generation
of game system, including emulators for non game systems like arcade hardware, PCs, and mobile phones, along with emulators on game systems! so check the wiki out if you’re interested!
